I have always been the person who avoids this at all costs. I’ve seen it as mind pollution brainwashing society to act like fucking soulless, tunnel-visioned morons. But just went downstairs and it was on and thought why I take myself and everything else so seriously sometimes? If I’m truly to be free from societal norms then I need to allow my mind the freedom to not take things seriously; and also to rise above the bullshit that sometimes is spurted out that is detrimental to my preferred paradigms.
As an extreme example, it’s about becoming that guy who has a gun to his head backed by a frantic lunatic and you can just shrug your shoulders, careless of whether it happens or not and when the perpetrator realises your lack of raised energy it instantly calms them down.
As a less extreme example, it’s about becoming the guy who can take all kinds of abuse from a girl they’re with, her saying some real dark shit and smashing things up; and you just shake your head look her in the eyes and appreciate her emotions whatever they are and have the clarity of mind to handle the situation.
It’s about not letting shit outside your own energy effect you in any way.
"I go beyond the fears and limitations of other people" - Elliott Hulse
"Other peoples opinions of me are none of my business." - Unknown
Coming back to Celebrity Juice - when I did watch it tonight, I found a lot of it funny. This reminded me that I need to sometimes spend time watching things that are comedic and take a break from the serious self-progressive stuff I’m usually well into and just take some time to laugh and be silly. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a stiff… 80% of my day is made up of banter and if people aren’t into it then they usually don’t stick around my presence long. I love to have a laugh and people know me that way, but there’s always room to elevate that state when rooted deep into my character is a driven, focused and self-improving virtue.
I’m not even trying to make a funny programme deep here, or compromising with myself for enjoying it. I’ve just realised that it’ll benefit my character to be comfortable enough that watching/listening to/participating in something will not be enough to change my character, virtues and purpose. Once you get the foundation of those things down anything you do will only help you improve your being.
Sometimes you set yourself to a task, you commit and everything just falls into place. You’re on a winning streak with your projects or objectives, you feel at the top of your game and your energy levels are soaring. I’ve seen it mentioned as a few different terms, memorable ones are:
- "the state"
- "the now"
But I’ve (and so does Kanye) always called it ‘the zone’. When you’re in the zone, you’re immortal. Nobody can stop you, all of your senses are heightened, your mind is clear, you’re creative, you’re free, you’re quick, you’re full of energy.
This morning it dawned on me, we should aim to always be living in the zone. This is the key to success, with everything!
Too often I head fuck myself and don’t trust myself to do the things that I am good at. I lower my own self-esteem as a result of [over]thinking. I question myself if I can still do things if I haven’t done them for an amount of time, so I get obsessive and compulsive about practicing. This is something I do in everything in my life. I lose trust and confidence in my own abilities.
Why do I do this? It’s a result of years of mind conditioning for defence and comfort, until the past year I’ve never known the skill of witnessing my own thoughts in a mindful and analytic way. Whenever I’ve considered my thoughts in the past I’ve thought about them, spiralling into more thoughts and more considerations. A clouded mind full of thoughts (which aren’t even real), there’s no room for clarity, no room for spontaneous thoughts to occur.
When you allow your mind this space I’m talking about, by spending time NOT thinking [meditating], you naturally somehow occasionally get thoughts pop up which wouldn’t have occurred if you were in an escalator of non-stop thought.
"The mind then gives form to the creative impulse or insight. Even the great scientists have reported that their creative breakthroughs came at a time of mental quitetude." - Eckhart Tolle
But this clarity and mind space doesn’t only happen when you meditate. Meditation is practice of obtaining this clarity by focusing on nothing but the present moment, letting your thoughts be and then letting them leave by witnessing them. When you start practicing doing this on a regular basis you start to bring the techniques into everyday life.
'The zone' is coming from a state of mind without thoughts interrupting your flow and fluidity. You can succeed, be creative and be physically expressive without hindrance because your thoughts are not there to tell you not to or that you're not good enough to.
I’m now going to start focusing on living in the zone as much as possible.
- I’m going to trust myself that I can do the things I’m good at.
- I’m going to start practicing being brutally positive about myself. I have no reason to have a low self esteem, I’m confident so shouldn’t let my mind have these periods where I stop believing in myself and let my thoughts control me.
- I’m going to continue practicing meditation to ensure I’m giving my mind room to be quiet and clear.
- I’m going to continue practicing all the things I enjoy and am good at so that I’m always staying on top of my game.
- I’m going to continue looking after my health and aiming towards a stronger & more powerful body. It’s important I remain strict about health choices & training so that I don’t give myself an excuse to let my mind tell me I’m being lazy and becoming less than my potential..
That final conversation they had was the best one and it’s one I’m dealing with in my self assessment every day. I’m an artist [primarily] - I make music. That’s my focus. Yet, I’m also a martial artist, which shares equal focus. The problem is, I have a constant battle in my head between being the artist and being the martial artist. I want to express myself in two completely different ways. One side of me wants to be, for lack of better words, melancholic; I WANT to be ‘in the clouds’ very sub-conscious dominant, emotional, to an extent reckless, drunk, adventurous, spontaneous… Then the other half of me wants to be regimented, strict, healthy, strong; equally as much.
It’s hard doing as Bruce Lee says, and these guys are discussing, expressing yourself as an artist healthily (or at least in the area of art I express) without using your body itself as the expression… When the sub-conscious dominant, non-athletic art’s at work there’s a tendency to move towards a less healthy state of mind and body to encourage the soul to cry.
This is the balance I’m working on.
My body is just a host between my soul and keyboard… There is no thinking involved, the soul knows how to express itself.